Thursday, July 1, 2010

Thoughts Along The Road

Today we drove down from Ohio to North Carolina. As anyone keeping up with my blog knows, my daughter is in Greensboro visiting her father and I am on a vacation that will end with picking my daughter up and heading home. I have pictures on my phone that I will be posting later with my comments attached. For now, I will leave you with my thoughts regarding things I heard and/or saw along the road.

1. We stopped at a rest stop to get some food and go to the bathroom (not necessarily in that order) and I heard something interesting in the stall next to me. There was a lady (from here on out, referred to as Rest Stop Toilet Lady) talking on her cell phone while going to the bathroom. Yes, I realize that this is kind of weird and not necessarily sanitary, but that is what she was doing. She was quite loud and the bathroom echoed, so I could not help but hear her half of the conversation. Among many things she talked about, she eluded to the fact that she did not like public restrooms, especially one that didn't have the little paper covers to put on the seat. (this one did not) During this conversation, she said something that I could not help but laugh at: "They need to make a car with its own toilet".

Hey, Rest Stop Toilet Lady, you are in luck! There is a brand spankin' new invention that just hit the market. It's called an RV. And not only did they give it a toilet of its very own to have and to hold (during drunken nights when one should not be driving), but they also included a sink and a shower in the bathroom area. Ooh! AND they took it a step further...rather than listen to requests later on for improvements, they added a bed, and a microwave, and a whole kitchen area, and even a table to eat at! OMG, I cannot believe that no one in the history of the world has EVER thought of this before or thought to advertise it when they did!!! What could they have been thinking?!

For future reference, my dear Rest Stop Toilet Lady, the RV as we know it today was established in the United States in the 1920's. Also, before that it was in Canada in 1910. And before THAT there were covered wagons that served the function of people living in them (commonly known as caravans) in Europe and England in the early 1800's. While I don't expect you to know the facts about the 1920's or the covered wagons (especially since I found the info on wikipedia), I do think you should at least be aware that the big bus-looking things that can occasionally be found on the road, are in fact, NOT BUSES! They are RV's, and they do in fact have their own toilet. And yes, they are available for your purchase if you are THAT worried about it.


2. This one is a much smaller thought. Really, more of an amusing thing my mom said. I was taking pictures and using the zoom on my phone. It makes a sound like a small engine, such as in a moped or something... She looked at me and asked me, "Does your phone know it's driving?"

This worries me though...I thought SHE was driving... If she thinks the phone is driving, and the phone thinks she is driving....then who is steering this ship?


3. This next one would be in the picture commentaries later, but a semi truck got in the way as I took the picture. Seeing as all the pictures were taken while I was in a moving vehicle, I did not have the option to retry snapping the photo.

We were in West Virginia, passing through Charlotte, and I noticed a sign that I could not just leave alone. It said: "Where's your West Virginia?"

Umm....where's YOUR West Virginia??? Because I thought I was IN my West Virginia...Did the map get it wrong? Am I supposed to be elsewhere??

I dunno about you, but I find it a big redundant to have a sign that asks me where West Virginia is...IN the state of West Virginia....roflcopter droppin' roflwaffles


4. As we passed through one of the mountain tunnels and came out in Virginia on the other end, I noticed a sign "Check Lights". Hmm...let me check...yep, still got 'em.


5. There were many a funny road and/or town, and just signs in general along the way that provided me with amusement. Several of these you will see later when I post pictures, but there were a couple that I did not manage to get pictures of. One of these was Fish Hatchery Rd.

I must know, where on this road exactly is the Fish Hatchery? Can I go there? How much does it cost to get to hatch a fish egg? Now, do I bring my own fish egg, or do I get to pick one out? Do I get to sit on it and watch it hatch?? huh, huh, do I do I do I????


6. While driving down the road, I saw a truck that said "Bowman Gin".

I don't know about you, but I don't quite feel comfortable with a guy that is operating a bow and arrow drinking gin... I simply feel that maybe if you are drinking and operating lethal equipment...that this might be an unsafe combination...


7. "Burn Headlights"
I'm sure that this means something else, but here's my reaction to this sign: "But if I burn them, they will no longer be useful."


8. And finally (for now), we passed a billboard that I would just be at serious fault for not mentioning. It was an advertisement for a convenience store. It read: Fresh Snacks, Cold Drinks, Good Neighbors.

Are neighbors now being advertised as refreshments?


More later, which will include pictures, and possibly some things from the ride back as well. I hope you enjoyed these little thoughts as much as we did, dear followers.

(And I promise that a full review of the movie Eclipse will follow eventually, but as I am on vacation, it might not be until NEXT weekend)

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